Thursday, April 2, 2009

Caution: Heavy-handed allegory ahead

Tonight I was finishing lining the fridge (those Reynolds foil people must make a killing come Pesach time) and I found myself lining the outside of a drawer. I realized why I was doing this-so that other people should see that I had lined the drawer. And it hit me-this is exactly what Pesach is not about! Pesach is about changing ourselves, revealing our inner soul powers, focusing on the chametz we have in our personality and getting rid of it. Pesach is not about fooling others, even if we can. It may not look as pretty, but the truth is worth it.

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OK, now that we've gotten that miserable little real-life moshol behind us, the question becomes, "What else?" Maybe nothing? But that would be boring. And intelligent. Yup, boring I go for. Oy.

33 comments:

Nemo said...

Seriously, what kind of idiot buys name-brand foil?

yossi said...

i use surround wrap. much easier that foil and doesn't come off as easily.

le7 said...

Nice. Your advice column name should be Mr. Mosholim.

Modeh B'Miktsas said...

Pesach is about telling everyone how frum we are. That's why we shake out the rugs outside and publish whole books about what became chametz this year. This time it's the red potatoes apparently.

The Real Shliach said...

Nemo: Ever heard of Cosco or Sam's Club?

Yossi: We tried something similar last year, and it made the fridge super-sticky.

le7: Hmm, that's an idea...

Modeh: Red potatoes? Really?! Can we get an explanation?

Modeh B'Miktsas said...

The dye used to make the bad red potatoes look like good red potatoes is allegedly chametz derived. What did we do for pesach before there were chametz potatoes?

The Real Shliach said...

Is there any better religion for OCD people than ours?

Sef said...

noice. noice.
and what about the people that skip the cleaning and go to florida?

sarabonne said...

Pesach is that time of year when the difference between pious and fanatical become a very fine line. Jolly good fun for fresh BTs.

Modeh B'Miktsas said...

TRS: כל מה שאסרה תורה נתן כיוצא בה בהיתר The torah forbids financial shenanigans but allows mechiras chametz. (if you don't think it's a shenanigan ayen mateh efraim.) It forbids us to work our fellow Jews "befarech" but mandates pesach cleaning.

Sef: They are employing ha'aromos to get out of keeping pesach like they are supposed to and will burn. BURN DO YOU HEAR ME BURN!! BWAAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(ha'aromos, just like those shgotzim who sell their chometz)

sarabonne said...

my point exactly....

The Real Shliach said...

Sef: Halachicly, you aren't allowed to own pesach on chametz. You also aren't allowed to sell chametz within thirty days without searching for it. So in fact, those who leave for Florida or other sunny climes must indulge in a little pre-Pesach work like the rest of us. (besides, aren't you going to CA?)

Sara: The Friediker Rebbe once said that in Lubavitch we don't look too kindly upon those who are "too frum", but on Pesach it's a good thing.

Of course, in general, those who are less frum than me are frie, and those who are more frum are fanatics.

Modeh: Go see how the Alter Rebbe deals with mechiras chametz, and you'll see that it's no shenagigan. And don't ask me to explain it either, because I have no clue. Rabbi Chaim Schapiro though gives a great two hour shiur on the subject.

And what's wrong with going away for Pesach? If I had the money, and trusted the kashrus (which I wouldn't) then I would totally do so.

Sara: Yup.

Nemo said...

Yeah, we Lubavs are a little nutty about making a bonafide sale of chametz that we go out of our way to make sure there is chametz gamur in the cabinet.

yossi said...

o well. we have been doing it for years and it has been wonderful.

Cheerio said...

i don't know why, making it happen is a pain in the unmentionable body part, and it has not much to do with anything, but - i really like the way the fridge looks when it's all lined with foil.

The Real Shliach said...

Yossi: doing what?

cheerio: I'm glad someone appreciates my efforts.

Modeh B'Miktsas said...

TRS: First of all I was being sarcastic, the bwahaha should have clued you in. And it is so a shenanigan. The mateh efraim says so and he is the earliest acharon to deal with the actual procedure and in fact is everyone else's basis for it. If you don't want to call it that then what do you call being maqneh metaltilen she'einam ba'en l'akum bishtar?

Nemo: That's not nutty, it's getting around the problem of not being able to be maqneh blios. Eating matza over a plastic bag, now that's nutty.

Cheerio: Bet you enjoy it more when someone else did the covering.

Nemo said...

No, putting wrapping paper on the checkout counters in the grocery store is nutty.

Putting a sock on your spout on your kitchen spout is nutty.

Not using the sefarim that you use is nutty.

And all that aluminum foil usage ... that's plain old harmful.

I'm having a green Pesach this year by eating out at other people's houses. I don't even think I'm going to vacuum my apartment, to save electricity of course.

Nemo said...

Modeh, I'm no well read on anything Jewish anymore, so I'm just speculating here ... but since when do you have to see what you're buying before being able to make a kinyan?

If he has a contract with specific details about his rights, gives some form of payment, and has a legal right of way to access his purchase*, under secular law, at least, he has made a valid purchase.

* This is either expressed or implied in every contract.

The Real Shliach said...

Nemo: What about the the carbons released by the matzah baking?

yossi said...

using surround wrap.

The Real Shliach said...

Fun fun fun.

Nemo said...

Yossi kiddo, the first time you wrote it I gave you the benefit of the doubt, now you're just asking to get harassed ...

It's Saran wrap, not surround wrap. Saran is a brand name.

http://www.saranbrands.com/

Modeh B'Miktsas said...

Nemo, ba'en as in existant. Selling blios raises problems of maqneh davar shelo ba leolam.

Nemo said...

Oh, silly me ... It's hard to read through the transliteration.

So if it's such a problem selling blios, sell the whole keli.

Nemo said...

On second blush, that was also a pretty am ha'ratzishe translation on my part. I'm thoroughly embarrassed.

Modeh B'Miktsas said...

Don't worry about it. After what I've heard from the "best bochurim" in my yeshiva you can be forgiven misinterpreting a transliteration or two. As for selling the keli, do you really want to be toivel two whole sets of dishes, silverware, pots, pans and sundry ironmongery barely a week after pesach cleaning?

Nemo said...

I hear ya ... this discussion is bringing me back ...

Modeh B'Miktsas said...

Back to what, or should I be afraid to ask?

le7 said...

Nemo, don't you have to study torts or something?

Der Shygetz said...

LS"D

Did you unroll the foil and toivel it? If not you cannot use it for Pesach (or to make shtreimlach).

The Real Shliach said...

I only use "surround wrap" for my shtreimlach.

Nemo said...

Bringing me back to the things I used to know during my yeshiva/shimmush years.