Short order cooks

Faithful followers of TRS will certainly recall a discussion we had a few weeks ago regarding food which must, according to Halacha, be thrown into a toilet and not even left for a dog. As I was doing chazarah over this piece a thought occurred to me which I felt warranted an audience with our mighty leader Rabbi Chaim Schapiro. Once he had disposed of all the questioners who preceded me I got my chance to ask the question which would no doubt change Judaism as we know it. "If your wife is a really bad cook, and the food tastes really bad, can you give it to a dog?" The rabbi was struck by the insightfulness displayed by this question, and proceeded to analyze it. Turns out we're not talking about people's own dogs, because the benefit accrued by feeding them this forbidden mixture is obvious. Rather we must be talking about feeding someone else's fido. So what benefit could there possibly be here? As Rabbi Dovid Shochet, brother of the Rosh and Taaruvos tester extraordinaire says, "You don't get bit by the dog. That's a benefit, no?" Of course then my question is still not answered. If the food is bad enough to make the dog attack you, so there's no benefit involved, can you feed it to your neighbor's great labrador?

Meanwhile, in other communication today, I overheard our esteemed rabbi explain that when you call someone you can't pick up clicks on your phone, because such behavior is downright rude. After all, you called them, and now you're wasting their precious time like this?
After the Rabbi said that he noticed me smiling and made a scared motion with his head. I said, "What, I can't smile?" When I graduated kindergarten they awarded me the Mr. Smiles award." The Rabbi countered, "Smiling is fine, except when it's the mischievous type you so recently displayed."