Sunday, February 8, 2009

Titled

Sometimes I have nothing to write, and I end up writing nothing worth reading, because, as I mentioned, I have nothing to write. Other times I have lots to write, and I end up writing nothing, because I have lots to write. It's a vicious business us bloggers are in. The good news is that tonight I really have a lot to write. Whether I get to it all is an entirely different question.

First on the agenda is a link to the latest and greatest Haveil Havalim, a compendium of a bunch of blogs that was produced quite nicely by some guy with an apostrophe in his name. He did something which almost no one else does, which is to give me more than three words. Seriously, how do you sum up an entire post in three words? Especially one of mine? So I appreciate his sentences. I solemnly do pledge that when I run my very own HH (coming up in about a month) I'll give everyone a good cursing out for at least a paragraph.

Next up is the saga of the shoes. Faithful readers will recall my struggles two weeks ago to find a new pair of protection for my feet. Another visit to Sears proved to be fruitless, even though this one had the shoes available for purchase off of shelves where customers could get to 'em. There just weren't any 11.5s. The reason for this shocking lack of TRS-compatible footwear was explained by a kindly saleshuman at Macys; turns out stores are phasing out half sizes in an effort to control costs and the minds and bodies of virtually every American. If you thought the revolution was going to come from the socialists or commies or somesuch group, well, you were wrong. The revolution will be televised, and sponsored, and produced, and watched, by Nike wearers. Don't say I didn't warn you.
Anyway, back to shopping. Macys proved to be a really good place to buy shoes. Aside from feeling really weird when a guy who was possibly twice my age helped me put on my shoes, things went well. It's a rather funny thing, but one of the pairs of shoes I actually got is an 11. I know, I betrayed my principles, but what could I do? At least the next pair was the size I thought I was supposed to get. The main thing here is that I got these shoes in less time than it took to blog all of this. Boom! and there I have shoes. Oh, the humanity.

I'd write more, but understandably, I'm too tired.

68 comments:

Crawling Axe said...

A revolution of .5-sizers doesn’t need to happen. If there is enough of them to create a revolution, they will create enough of a demand for .5 sizes to appear.

Unless, of course, companies that can’t keep up with .5-size–providing competition will go to the brink of bankruptcy but will be bailed out by our socialist government. In that case, yes, a revolution may happen. Considering, however, the effectiveness of our Commander in Chief so far, I don’t know…

As my boss said, it’s like a Chinese blessing. “May you live in interesting times.”

I just thought, btw, that I may use your travails with footwear to illustrate an important concept that is incompatible with liberals’ brains — capitalist help the little man before they help the big man. They create products that are 1) cheap, 2) numerous, 3) in great variety, 4) in better quality. The less they are taxed, the more money they can invest into their business, the more of the above happens.

And their products are not geared towards rich people. Rich people have their shoes custom-made. It’s the poor yeshiva bochurim (and other poor folks) whom Eibeshter gave feet of anomalous sizes that suffer first.

Imagine what will happen if chv"sh Obama will have his way. Forget about .5 sizes. We’ll be limited to two or three sizes of shoes in general. When you put a stick in the wheels of the market machinery, what do you expect?

(I bet you thought this was a post about nothing, huh? Not so fast…)

LE7 said...

Congratulations on the shoes.

The Real Shliach said...

CA: I still think this post stank. That's what happens when you write at 5 AM.
LE7: thanks.

LE7 said...

Sorry you wrote at 5am?

The Real Shliach said...

Somewhere around there.

Crawling Axe said...

Nu, if you had to do a bad job at something, better it be some shtus, rather than something worthy.

The Real Shliach said...

Them's comforting words.

Modeh B'Miktsas said...

CA: There you go again with the fallacy that socialism is somehow liberal. Socialism is so similar to fascism that you have to inquire as to the politician's party affiliation before you accuse him of one or the other.

Crawling Axe said...

TRS — what, would you be better off learning Gemara? Half-asleep? Better blog. As A"R says in Tanya, eating ice cream is less damaging to the soul than learning physics.

I am not saying that socialism is liberal. I am saying that modern American liberalism is socialist. Liberalism in the modern interpretation is fascism.

Modeh B'Miktsas said...

Which is why -- if you want to be technically correct and not buy into the Liberal propaganda machine -- you should capitalize Liberal so people know you are referring to the movement and not the adjective.

Anonymous said...

what is vd"l?

Crawling Axe said...

And any time I reference to a homosexual I should write “Gay”?

sarabonne said...

I think it means "for those who understand the esoteric knowledge" or something like that.

Crawling Axe said...

It means, “If by now you don’t know what I am talking about, you are not as smart as you think.” Or in farbrengen shprach, “If you get it, you get it. If you don’t, you don’t. Nu, veiter.”

lechatchila aribber said...

may you wear the shoes in good health.

The Real Shliach said...

VD"L=it's enough for the understanding.
Lechatchila: thank you.

LE7 said...

Can what happen? Does anyone on this here blog get the poll?

Modeh B'Miktsas said...

Sarabonne: A better translation is "if you don't get it you're not as smart as me. If that bothers you here, drown your sorrows.

CA: No, that one isn't nearly as confusing.
LE7:That's the point.

LE7 said...

MBM - that is what you think.

The Real Shliach said...

Even though them who were supposed to understand didn't, I'm glad to see that most people are still voting correctly.

LE7 said...

Hey I'm real smart and I got it (I think).

The Real Shliach said...

Yeah, you probably did. Only really smart people get things like this.

Modeh B'Miktsas said...

I got it. (I think. It could be any one of five things but I have my guesses.)

sarabonne said...

Well as long as no one's saying what "it" is, I'm gonna say I got it too.

The Real Shliach said...

I highly doubt either of you got it. If you did, then you can email me for confirmation. Whoever gets it right gets a prize. Whoever posts possibilitys on this here public forum gets a life time ban. Don't say I didn't warn you.

sarabonne said...

I think I'll play it cautious and do neither.

The Real Shliach said...

What a boring decision. An email never hurt anyone...

sarabonne said...

Hm. You'd be surprised.

The Real Shliach said...

As long as you're not drunk or high or anything...

sarabonne said...

I don't need substance of such sorts for my imagination...

The Real Shliach said...

So, excercise it!

sarabonne said...

Oh it gets plenty of work. Its my logic that I'm worried about.

Dovid said...

Can we take a poll of how many people understood the poll?

Dovid said...

Anyway I'm blindly voting yes "it" can.

sarabonne said...

Well the thing is that "it" was never confirmed as a set thing, open to the whim of TRS.

The Real Shliach said...

Too many polls make jack a jaded boy.

Excellent choice.

The Real Shliach said...

Sara: "it" is a very specific thing, and it has been since the beginning of the poll.

LE7 said...

Will the 'it' be publicly explained after some given interval?

The Real Shliach said...

if it's appropiate, then yes, all will be revealed.

sarabonne said...

Let us hope so. Perhaps in 6 days, sheesh, what a wait.

The Real Shliach said...

I doubt it'll be that soon. But who knows, stranger things have happened.

LE7 said...

That would be hilarious.

The Real Shliach said...

At least someone gets it.

Crawling Axe said...

I finally realized what everyone is talking about.

What sort of narishe kasha is this? Of course it can happen.

Cheerio said...

Yes, IT can!
I'll go vote.
also - post pictures of the shoes, dude! then we can all criticize/compliment your taste. won't that be fun?

The Real Shliach said...

Cheerio gets it. CA? Not so much. Besides, you people were supposed to email you me theories.
Re: shoes: I'll see what I can do.

LE7 said...

I want to know who voted no.

Crawling Axe said...

Nu, we are all crawling in the darkness.

LE7, it’s always the same people.

The Real Shliach said...

CA: at this point, it's just you.
LE7: I hope never to meet him/her.

Crawling Axe said...

Only me? I’ll try to subdue my ego and not feel too special.

Speaking of Lipa, what is the other guy’s problem? Not with Lipa, but in general.

The Real Shliach said...

Well, you're the only one still trying to figure it out.

I don't know. Maybe he was traumatized as a child.

Crawling Axe said...

You assume I am trying. Perhaps I’ve given up long ago.

Crawling Axe said...

Ah. A lot of that seems to be going on.

LE7 said...

Wait Axel you figured it out?

Crawling Axe said...

No, I was talking about child abuse.

I am still happily in the dark. And don’t you dare spoil it for me.

LE7 said...

Don't worry. I'm not even sure if I know.

Crawling Axe said...

Btw, the only reason for the youtube name is that this one was taken. Well, the same reason is regarding this one. Originally it wasn’t supposed to be crawling.

LE7 said...

No I like to call you Axel because is diminutive. Like Teibel/Teiba or Feigel/Feiga

Crawling Axe said...

Hmm. That’s cool (considering that my real name can’t be made into Yiddish diminutive). So, you’re not a fan of Jules Verne then.

Crawling Axe said...

There is a guy in our shull whose name is somebody ben Yossel. Every time he is called to aliyah, my rabbi asks: “Are you sure?”

LE7 said...

That's really funny! My mom is bas Eitel and I always wanted to ask her is she was sure...

LE7 said...

Also can't say I read Jules Verne.

Crawling Axe said...

He should be taught on your Russian literature class. I mean, I know he is French, but Russian kinderlach are much more familiar with him than with Tolstoy or Uncle Fyodor. Also Mark Twain. And Mein Reed. And James Fenimor Cooper, whom Americans obviously don’t read (although they’ve seen the movie probably). I don’t know, what do American boys read?

Crawling Axe said...

Probably Stephen King.

LE7 said...

Beats me. Ask an American boy.

We talked a bit about Western literature being translated into Russian during the 19th Century. Yup.

The Real Shliach said...

The last of the Mohicans? Great book.

Crawling Axe said...

I like it too, but I also like the Spy.

Crawling Axe said...

Also O. Henry. And R.L. Stevenson. And A.C. Doyle. Oh, I could go on. I think it’s because these are not required to read in school — therefore, everybody loves them and hates Russian authors.

Although we didn’t just hate but despised Ukrainian authors. One time in 7th or 8th grade the whole class refused to read Shevchenko for being an antisemite.