Tuesday, December 18, 2007

A definition please?

In response to Eliezer's comment: What exactly is a bad Bochur? Or a good Bochur? There are so many different criterion that I bet no Bochur could fulfill them all. And conversely, everyone has at least some redeeming characteristics. But I'm not dealing with these"Bad Boys" right now. Anyway, in my experience, half of all Bochurim are good, a third are terrible, and a third are exceptional. Oh yes, and at any given time at least 51% are not interested in getting married while 52% are interested. See how complicated this all is? Once again, a graphic description of how Lubavitch simply defies the laws of arithmetic.
My second issue with the comment is his assertion that girls are intentionally Freying out in order to appeal to modern Bochurim. I'm sure that some do, but come one, is this some kind of vast right-wing conspiracy to rid the world of all that is right and good in the warrens that make up our beloved Crown Heights, and indeed the whole Lubavitch world? Sure, there is a vast right-wing conspiracy, but I assure you that it has nothing whatsoever to do with Chabad and its minions. Or minyans. Take your pick. Point is, unless girls are really vastly different from boys, does anyone really model their behavior in a manner solely intended for display on the meat market that is our Shidduch process? I certainly don't. A quick check has brought to my attention that in fact, not everyone thinks with the purity and good intentions which I myself profess to have. Scandalous, eh?
In conclusion, I'll guess we'll just have to say that this world is slightly more cynical than is healthy for any normal person to experience. Perhaps I'll go hide for the next three years in a little cave somewhere on the border between South Africa and Zimbabwe. At least the weather will be a bit better. Hopefully.

42 comments:

e said...

Yeah, you misunderstood me. No girl's saying, "If I'm an aidel maidel, there won't be any good bochurimg for me. I better fry out and get one of those plentiful bad boys out there."

What I'm saying is that if anyone is modifying their behavior for shiddduch purposes (as you tentatively suggested) the girls are getting worse to equal the boys. b/c now there's a major good-boy shortage.

Just like a guy said...

which means that there's hope for us, eh Eliezer?

e said...

Of course! There's a shortage of good boys. If you're a good boy, you'll have girls' mothers calling your mother begging for you!

e said...

Finally!!! Hitherto, you posted, I commented, you posted, I commented, and that was that. Now we see the development of a phenomenon essential for the TRS we know and love today: responding in a comment instead of waiting to respond in the next day's post!

Just like a guy said...

Someone should write a doctoral dissertation on this!

le7 said...

IT'S TRUE. RUBASHKIN SAID THAT TODAY NONE OF THE BOYS HAVE BEARDS AND THE GIRLS....

whatever forget it. This sort of stuff drives me nuts and I could keep commenting alllllllllllll day about it.

le7 said...

Not that girls are freing out but that the slowly slowly compromise... and the longer they wait to get married after leaving seminary... slowly slowly slowly... it's a process.

Just like a guy said...

When did Rubashkin say anything?

le7 said...

At a private gathering 3 Tammuz 5768.

Just like a guy said...

Ahh. And anyway, what's the end of the quotation?

le7 said...

Basically lack of good boys.

Just like a guy said...

IT'S TRUE. RUBASHKIN SAID THAT TODAY NONE OF THE BOYS HAVE BEARDS AND THE GIRLS...LACK OF GOOD BOYS?

(and anyway, I know plenty of very good boys)

le7 said...

Yeah but I know plenty of really good girls. Way more than boys.

Just like a guy said...

How do you know? I know very few girls, you know very few boys...

le7 said...

I know because when one of my friends tries to get married it's much harder for her than it is for your friends.

Just like a guy said...

But that's not a function of being "good" or "bad".

le7 said...
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Just like a guy said...

I detect a little bias here. I happen to know many very good boys. Just because you don't know them doesn't mean that they're not there. If I based my opinion of Lubavitch girls on the girls I've run into online or the girls I see in the streets of CH...

le7 said...

There is no bias. How come I know a billion amazing girls who are 28 and not married? Stop it. You're full of it.

Just like a guy said...

I know many very good guys who are also older...

listen, I admit that there is an imbalance, but it's genetic, i.e. there are physically more girls than boys...

le7 said...
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Just like a guy said...

How do you do an emoticon of raised eyebrows, as in, "oh, this is a first..."

le7 said...
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Just like a guy said...

So you mean it's ok if I vehemently disagree?

le7 said...
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Just like a guy said...

So I should accept that I'm wrong even though you refuse to explain yourself? I'm not buying it.

le7 said...
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Just like a guy said...

Well, as soon as you do so I might possibly listen to what you have to say.

le7 said...
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Just like a guy said...

No less ouch than "No it's not. Shut up." In fact, it seems like this is an issue for both of us?

le7 said...
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Just like a guy said...

I'm not friends with girls.

le7 said...
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Just like a guy said...

Au revoir.

e said...

trs: I fear your love of arguments has led you not to listen to your wise fiancee's words. She's right. Plain and simple. Haven't you read the articles in N'shei how guys gotta marry girls their age b/c of the imbalance etc.? There are more good girls than boys. A lot more.

e said...

(I'm on the girls' side of the whole shidduch crisis issue, because I fear that I too am getting the short end of the stick.)

Just like a guy said...

Nshei says it and therefore it's true?

How are you on the short end of the stick?

le7 said...

No. le7 says it, therefore it's true.

Just like a guy said...

Touché.

e said...

N'shei says it, therefore you should know about it. It's true regardless.

I'm getting the short end of the stick because I'm not one of the good boys who are in short supply. I'm a bad boy who is long supply. (sorry about the pun.)

Altie said...

trs: ^ ^ raised eyebrows.

e- tragic.

oh, and trs it looks like u are arguing with yourself. just saying.

Just like a guy said...

Happens.