Monday, January 14, 2008

Bochurim who have girlfriends have brains the size of a peanut. I'm being serious. You want to know why I say this? (btw, this has potential, because I'm rather livid) I was just exposed to an article on about another major problem in Lubavitch. It's funny, Lubavitch only has major problems. There are no minor problems that we can just ignore and pray for disappearance of; rather we have major problems that we do ignore and don't even bother to pray for. Anyway, back to my original point. The article is about girls on Shlichus who get used by the Shluchim and Shluchos who bring them out. Do I agree that it's terrible for girls to get no food, for girls to not get paid, for girls to be used as cleaning ladies and babysitters, for girls to be guilted into doing things, "For the Rebbe", that no normal human being would ever do. My problem with this is, what are they thinking? Are they thinking at all? Whatever happened to leaving? Back in the day, when I was a counselor in a camp in California, I decided that for my spiritual, physical, mental, and biological well being, I should leave and go home. And guess what? I have not regretted this decision once since then. Why, instead of taking action, do these people think that they have to waste my time by putting op-eds up on websites. Sure, I had the choice not to read the article, but come on, you think a guy like me isn't going to read an unsigned editorial on a Lubavitch news website? Are you out of your cotton-picking mind?
Sorry, I guess that I just wasn't able to keep up the intensity of that rant for too long. Here's a cute little story. One Bochur came to me, back when I was a student at YOEC in CA, and told me how he had broken up with his girlfriend, because she was costing too much money. He was too dumb to realize that she was ruining more than his wallet, but I digress. The point is that even he understood the stupidity of his actions.
I was once at a Shtikel Farbrengen, and the Mashpia said that every Bochur needs a girlfriend. All ears present perked up, down, around, and then returned to the up position, ready to listen to every pearl flowing from the lion's mouth. He said that a major problem in Lubavitch (another one of them) was that Bochurim had no one to talk to, to trust, to love, to etc. So there are two solutions; one is to give every Bochur a girlfriend. The other option is to make sure that Bochurim have parents, teachers, and Mashpiim who they can talk to, someone they can trust, someone they can love, someone they can etc.
Like I've pointed out since the beginning of time, and possibly half an hour before that, there are Maalos and Chisronus, advantages and disadvantages, to each. Each could theoretically result and much good, and each could theoretically end in much bad. Lefi anias daati, according to my not so humble opinion, the bad far outweighs the good in the first option, and the good far outweighs the bad in the second. So once again, we're left with the conclusion that the only solution is good parenting. And praying to G-d. And having a brain.


Anonymous said...

I'm so glad that you started translating all those funny jargon words like ma'leh and chisoran. Now I understand what you're talking about. I think your site needs to be accessible to the entire world.

e said...

About the new poll: I wanted to vote for all of them except for number one. Unfortunately I could only choose one

Anonymous said...

the point of the oped article is for the regular ppl - not the extreme situations, where the girls/boys are living in subhuman conditions yadda yadda. its for the shluchim who are busy, and need to be reminded to take a little more time to spend with the ppl they hired.