Tripe

Here's something I wrote thirty three hundred (3300 for all the snivelling idiots out there) years ago. Please don't enjoy reading it, because I didn't particularly enjoy writing it. Why not? Because it's nonsense, absolutely ridiculous bloody nonsense. Almost as bad as Ricky Ponting was last week for the Brits.

You know what the problem with youth today is? The same problem that has plagued youth since the beginning of all time, that's what. The problem with youth is that they don't appreciate the self-sacrifice and manipulation their elders went through back in the day. All these youths care about is their beer gardens and poetry readers-do they appreciate the finer things in life, like hard work, self-sacrifice, and manipulation? I didn't think so. They'd rather sit back lazily and criticize then actually do anything productive, like get lives.

And you know, I'm talking about intelligent youth here. The idiots among us are on a far worse level. Not only do they not understand what it means to suffer for the future, but they don't even understand what "No" means. For some reason they refuse to exercise the vestigial organs that lie in between their ears, and instead proceed incautiously through life, showing as much caution for the insipid realities as they do for passing trucks, which is to say, none. And to top it all off, they don't even know the color of car they're driving. Talk about hair-brained.

And how about those crazy young people who go on diets and drink beer and eat organic chips. Is that normal? Like what exactly is the point? Is there one? I mean, if you want to be healthy, why eat organic chips? And if you're drinking beer, why do you have any illusions about your future physical well-being? Of course things are going to be fine! Like, what's the question?

And are people from Tel Aviv really incapable of rational thought? Why are they of the opinion that they know everything there is to know? These people are so intellectually dishonest that they honestly believe in a god who is dumber than them? What's the point of such a god? Does he make them strawberry smoothies in the morning or large bowls of Trader Joes corn soup (with pepper) at night?

Or perhaps he's just some sort of jealous old testament god with flaring nostrils and a gate like War Admiral. Point is (and this is getting back to those young dieters) it really bothers me when I'm coerced and manipulated into doing things I really don't want to do, like defend the Catholic church against angry mobs of abused choir boys. Is it my place to defend that institution? And why don't they pay me? Or at the very least name a cathedral after me or something. Idiots. All of them.

And please, don't even get me started about those do-nothing good-doer type people who refuse to recognize that sometimes the kindest thing you can do is to bomb the heck out of them three or four times and then shoot poison gas pamphlets all over the remainder. That would get them to pay attention.
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Meanwhile, in other news, thirty three hundred years ago, good things were happening. And what ruined them? I'll tell you what ruined them. The future. That's right. The stinking future.