Sunday, May 31, 2009

Relief!

I have a very important post for all of you. Stop whatever you're doing and go spend money at Gourmet Garage. Lots of money. Why? Very simple. You see, tonight I was with my family and Elisheva on the the West Side looking for a bathroom. All right, we weren't there to look for a bathroom, we were there to have a picnic and watch the New York Classical Theatre's production of King Lear, which I quite enjoyed. After that was completed it was time to head home, and incidentally find a men's.

Anyone who has ever been in Manhattan knows that though it might be the city that never sleeps it does take naps on a regular base. The result is that many establishments which would otherwise be ideal location in which to take care of one's business are not available for such goings on.

The first place we tried was a Rite-Aid, but they closed at 4:00 on Sundays. Can you imagine the chutzpah? Ridiculous. Next up was a CVS, and they were open too. Nice. In we walk, paying customers (my brother in law bought a Diet Coke), and I asked if I could use the bathroom. "Sorry, no, we don't have anyone who can take you back there right now." Oh, really? There are three employees lounging by the cash registers, and there's only one customer.

We then pushed on and spotted another Rite-Aid, but they were also closed. What is wrong with these people? Not to worry, because there was a Walgreens at the corner, and it was open too. And it too did not have public restrooms. Next I entered some sort of Asian operation, and they didn't have a "public" restroom.

I was about to give up, and possibly lose the use of my bladder for all time, when I chanced upon the Gourmet Garage on Broadway and 96th. I walked on, politely inquired of a kindly African-American man if I could use their bathroom, and lo and behold...he said, "Sure, follow me." Joy!

17 comments:

sarabonne said...

Well that was enlightening.

s(b.) said...

Toys "R" Us in Times Square should have a clean public restroom. I wouldn't expect a drugstore to have a public restroom. (Welcome to NY.)

C said...

Um.... TFS!

Agav... with new budget cuts... everything is closed. AT&T is now officially closed on Sundays. What the check? (Pronounced with a "ches" at the front)

Cheerio said...

what the heck is a gourmet garage?

sarabonne said...

Click on the link.

The Real Shliach said...

Sara: Ask Elisheva-I came out pledging to enlighten the world about their kindness.

s(b.): Get in the subway, go to Times Square, get out, find a bathroom, get back in the subway...with two nieces, aged 2.5 and 11 months?

C: TFS?

C said...

Thanks for sharing. A ;-/ is usually implied :).

le7 said...

It was quite the journey.

e said...

I agree with C. Was this really the only thing you could share with us? Your bathroom-related escapades can hardly be the most exciting thing in your day.

Dovid said...

Well I guess its good you didn't find relief at a mcdonalds. I can just imagine the ringing endorsement we would be seeing for their franchise.

EndOfWorld said...

you went with your nieces to see king lear? woohoo. talk about cultured.

anyway, while we all appreciate hearing about random acts of kindness, it was kinda weird to have a post devoted to...bladders?

The Real Shliach said...

C: ahh.

le7: 'Twas.

e: this wasn't about the bathroom! I was about random acts of goodness and kindness!

Dovid: what's wrong with mcdonalds?

EOW: yes we are.

Bladder are very important. Just ask people who don't have functioning ones.

Modeh B'Miktsas said...

Re Dovid: There is something seriously odd about a Real Shliach endorsing a basar b'chalav/chazir joint. Lest that not be bad enough, the basar/b'chalav is chalav akum

The Cereal Killer said...

Whew (however that's pronounced)!

Glad everything came out alright.

The Real Shliach said...

Modeh: The basar is neveilah anyway, who cares?

TCK: Me too!

s(b.) said...

trs: if the girls are that young, they have diapers, and toys "r" us's lavatory totally has a changing table! There are also hotels like the Marriott in Times Square which should (should) have a restroom. But moreso, Kosher Delight, Mr. Broadway (fleishigs) and JII (pizza) are all within snowball's distance of the intersection of 37th St. and Broadway (KD south of 37th, the other two just north). I doubt their men's rooms have changing tables, but there are restrooms. I would also mention Abigael's (40th/Bwy.), but the women's room there is super-tiny (I have never been in the men's room in any restaurant or toy store).

sb

The Real Shliach said...

Impressive comment. If I didn't make it clear though, I was the one in need of the men's, not the kiddies. The problem with the kiddies was that they were in a double stroller, not renowned for its maneuverability...